So I was trained to become a gymnast for two years in Hunan, China in the 1970s. When I was in the first grade, the government wanted to transfer me to a school for athletes, all expenses paid. 

七十年代时我在中国湖南练过两年体操。当我上小学一年级时，政府想让我转学去体校，一切免费。

But my tiger mother said, "No." My parents wanted me to become an engineer like them. After surviving the Cultural Revolution,they firmly believed there s only one sure way to happiness: a safe and well-paid job. It is not important if I like the job or not.

我那位虎妈说“不行”。我父母希望我长大象他们一样当工程师。作为文革的幸存者，他们坚定认为获得幸福的唯一可靠途径是一个安定高薪的工作，至于我喜不喜欢那个工作并不重要。

But my dream was to become a Chinese opera singer. That is me playing my imaginary piano. An opera singer must start training young to learn acrobatics, so I tried everything I could to go to opera school. I even wrote to the school principal and the host of a radio show. But no adults liked the idea. 

但我的梦想是成为黄梅戏演员。那是我在弹假想的钢琴。戏曲演员必须从小开始学身段功夫，我想尽了一切办法想去黄梅戏学校，甚至写信给戏校校长和一个电台节目主持人。 

No adults believed I was serious. Only my friends supported me, but they were kids, just as powerless as I was. So at age 15, I knew I was too old to be trained. My dream would never come true. I was afraid that for the rest of my lifesome second-class happiness would be the best I could hope for.

但没有一个大人喜欢那个主意，没有一个大人相信我是认真的。只有我的小伙伴们支持我，但他们也是小孩，和我一样无能为力。十五岁时，我知道自己要学戏已经年纪太大，我的梦想已不再可能实现。我担心在余下的一生里，自己的命就是得到些二流幸福而已。

But that s so unfair. So I was determined to find another calling. Nobody around to teach me? Fine. I turned to books.

老天不公啊！暗下决心要为自己寻找另一个使命 。周围无人赐教？没什么大不了， 我从书中学习。

I satisfied my hunger for parental advice from this book by a family of writers and musicians.["Correspondence in the Family of Fou Lei"]

《傅雷家书》满足了我对长辈教诲的期盼， 写书的傅家是一个作家、音乐家荟萃的家庭。

I found my role model of an independent woman when Confucian tradition requires obedience.["Jane Eyre"]

我从《简爱》这本书中找到了独立女性的榜样， 尽管儒家传统教人听话顺从。

And I learned to be efficient from this book.["Cheaper by the Dozen"]

我从《效率专家爸爸》这本书中学会高效率。

And I was inspired to study abroad after reading these.["Complete Works of Sanmao" (aka Echo Chan)] ["Lessons From History" by Nan Huaijin]

这几本书燃起了我对出国深造的渴望。（《三毛全集》、南怀瑾的《历史的经验》）

I came to the U.S. in 1995, so which books did I read here first? Books banned in China, of course. "The Good Earth" is about Chinese peasant life. That s just not convenient for propaganda. Got it. The Bible is interesting, but strange. 

我1995年来美国，在美国我首先读什么书呢？当然是中国的禁书。《大地》讲的是中国农民的故事，真实得不方便宣传。懂了。《圣经》很有趣但也很奇怪。

That s a topic for a different day. But the fifth commandment gave me an epiphany: "You shall honor your father and mother." "Honor," I said. "That s so different, and better, than obey." So it becomes my tool to climb out of this Confucian guilt trap and to restart my relationship with my parents.

那个话题他日再聊。但十诫中的第五诫给了我灵感：“你应荣耀你的父母”。我心里一动，“荣耀”不等于而且远胜于“服从”！它成为我爬出儒家负罪感的工具，让我重建与父母的关系。

Encountering a new culture also started my habit of comparative reading. It offers many insights. For example, I found this map out of place at first because this is what Chinese students grew up with. It had never occurred to me, China doesn t have to be at the center of the world. 

来到一个新文化环境也促成我比较阅读的习惯，它让人读得更深刻。举个例子，第一次看到这幅地图时我觉得它有些怪, 因为这才是中国大陆学生从小到大使用的世界地图。我之前从未意识到原来中国不一定非要位于世界地图中央。

A map actually carries somebody s view. Comparative reading actually is nothing new. It s a standard practice in the academic world. There are even research fields such as comparative religion and comparative literature.

原来地图带着某种视角。比较阅读并不新鲜，它是学术界里的标准做法，比较文学、比较宗教甚至成为专门研究领域。比较文学、比较宗教甚至成为专门研究领域。

Compare and contrast gives scholars a more complete understanding of a topic. So I thought, well, if comparative reading works for research, why not do it in daily life too? So I started reading books in pairs. So they can be about people -- ["Benjamin Franklin" by Walter Isaacson]["John Adams" by David McCullough] -- who are involved in the same event, or friends with shared experiences. ["Personal History" by Katharine Graham]["The Snowball: Warren Buffett and the Business of Life," by Alice Schroeder] 

对比对照让学者们对一个课题有更全面的了解。我琢磨着，既然比较阅读对研究有用，为什么不把它用在日常生活中呢？因此我开始把书成对来读。它们可以是关于同一事件的不同当事人，它们可以是关于同一事件的不同当事人，（《本杰明·富兰克林》、《约翰·亚当斯》）或两个有共同经历的朋友。（凯瑟琳·格雷厄姆的《个人历史》、巴菲特传记《雪球》）

I also compare the same stories in different genres -- (Laughter) [Holy Bible: King James Version]["Lamb" by Chrisopher Moore] -- or similar stories from different cultures, as Joseph Campbell did in his wonderful book.["The Power of Myth" by Joseph Campbell] For example, both the Christ and the Buddha went through three temptations.For the Christ, the temptations are economic, political and spiritual. For the Buddha, they are all psychological: lust, fear and social duty -- interesting.

我还把故事相同但文体不同的书做对比, （《圣经》、小说《羔羊》）或对比那些来自不同文化的相似故事，象约瑟夫·坎贝尔在其杰作《神话的力量》中所做的那样。举个例子，耶稣和佛祖都经历了三大诱惑，耶稣经历的是经济、政治和精神诱惑， 佛祖经历的则都是心理诱惑：欲望、恐惧和社会责任——有意思。

So if you know a foreign language, it s also fun to read your favorite books in two languages. ["The Way of Chuang Tzu" Thomas Merton]["Tao: The Watercourse Way" Alan Watts] Instead of lost in translation, I found there is much to gain. For example, it s through translation that I realized "happiness" in Chinese literally means "fast joy." Huh! "Bride" in Chinese literally means "new mother." Uh-oh. (Laughter)

如果你懂外语，把你喜欢的书的两个语言版本对比读也很有意思。（托马斯·默顿翻译的《庄子》、阿伦·瓦特翻译的《道德经》） 们常说翻译总有缺失，我却发现翻译也可以带来收获。举个例子，是翻译使我意识到原来中文“快乐”一词的字面意思可解为“快速欢乐”，呃... 中文“新娘”一词的字面意思可解为“新妈妈”，天啊！

Books have given me a magic portal to connect with people of the past and the present. I know I shall never feel lonely or powerless again. Having a dream shattered really is nothing compared to what many others have suffered. I have come to believe that coming true is not the only purpose of a dream. Its most important purpose is to get us in touch with where dreams come from, where passion comes from, where happiness comes from. Even a shattered dream can do that for you.

书已成为我与古人今人沟通的一个神奇门户， 书已成为我与古人今人沟通的一个神奇门户， 让我再不会觉得孤单无助。与其他人的苦难相比，梦想破灭算不了什么。与其他人的苦难相比，梦想破灭算不了什么。我渐渐意识到成真并非梦想的唯一目的， 我渐渐意识到成真并非梦想的唯一目的， 它的最重要目的是让我们触摸到 梦想来源的地方、 热情来源的地方、快乐来源的地方， 哪怕一个破灭的梦想也可以让你经历那种触摸。

So because of books, I m here today, happy, living again with a purpose and a clarity, most of the time. So may books be always with you.

因为书，我今天得以在此， 快乐地活着，生活的目标和意义重新变得明确， 在大部分时候。希望书也永远与你相伴！

Thank you.(Applause)

谢谢。（掌声）

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